Thin line separating stupid and rude

 

Outside doing some assorted bits of work around the yard.

Car coming down the road. Slowly. Couple of people inside. Blinker on. Every indication you might imagine of being lost.

They passed by, went a bit further down the road, pulled into a driveway and used it to turn around, and then crept up toward me.

It moved along as you might expect. Windows went down, car came to a stop, and the call came out from the passenger.

The question they had was whether I knew where a certain address was located. For about ten seconds we went back and forth, with me trying to gather some additional information because I didn’t know the address but could tell they were close.

Let’s hit pause for a moment to establish some fundamental facts in the scenario.

First… they were on the right road for the address they had.

Second… I don’t know any of the house numbers on my street. Never needed them.

I know the names of those around me, but never needed to send them mail… never really receive incorrectly delivered mail… couldn’t tell you which direction of the road is headed away from the heart of town… and so on when it comes to all the indicators of street numbering systems.

All of that in play, it was really evident that they should have been looking for the home directly across the street.

How did I know that? Well…

Imagine if I asked you where 5000 Pleasant View Road was located, and you lived at 4999 Pleasant View Road. Even if you don’t know the street numbers, well, duh… it should be on the other side of the road (the whole odd-even-numbering thing), and, with one number differing, the darn location is really close.

Basically, they asked me for 5000 Pleasant View Road, with me living at 4999, and there are literally no houses on the opposite side of the street for quite some distance in both directions.

So, I asked them to hold on for a moment. Told them it had to be the house across the street, and if they’d wait I’d walk over to check out the number on the roadside mailbox. They said fine.

I took ten steps… and it was going to be quite a few steps, since the driveway for the house isn’t right on top of ours… and they left. Pulled away. Headed down the street away from the house I had pointed out and back in the direction that had come.

I was too stunned for a moment to move. Shook my head for a second, watching the flashing light from the still engaged turn signal drift away, and then then continued on to the mailbox. (By that point I had to know if the address was correct. It was.)

Back to work. Grabbed my rake and moved along. Got five minutes of work done when…

A car was approaching from the distance. Passed my house, turned off the road and up the driveway across the street.

And… for me… yeah, rude.

Not in any particular common sense of rude, mind you. But more in a pet peeve sort of way. It bothers me when people ask questions but have no intention at all of listening to the response. Bothers me even more when presented to someone willing to go a few steps out of their way to offer assistance.

When considering this particular scenario, I don’t want to drive too far down the road exploring potential answers when… literally and figuratively… the answer is there directly across the street. However, I think it’s worth understanding what it means to ask a question. They’re not all rhetorical. Some of them are stupid. And when asked by the ignorant, they can be outright rude.

 

If you have any comments or questions, please e-mail me at Bob@inmybackpack.com