I’m
officially calling an end to all the fancy and limited edition
flavors of our favorite brands. (And, in some cases, all the fancy
and limited edition flavors of struggling to survive and hoping
to catch lightning in a bottle with something people suddenly
notice brands.)
Unfortunately,
people are too busy praising the genius of Lay’s Southern Biscuits
and Gravy chips to pay any attention to my declaration ending
such nonsense.
For
most of this amazing run… which has taken over everything from
beverages to ice cream to chips to cookies… I’ve just sat to the
side and shaken my head. Until…
Cookie
Dough Oreos.
I’ll
admit it, this might seem like a strange turning point.
After
all… Nabisco has treated us to all sorts of Oreo special editions.
Gingerbread is one of those flavors. Lemon Twist and Watermelon
are others. And when I heard there was a Candy Corn Oreos out
there… well, I’m pretty much convinced there isn’t a person in
the world that likes actual candy corn, so it would probably have
been natural for me to jump off the wagon and start a rant then
and there. But I didn’t.
I
know people that love the Birthday Cake Oreos… which, if I recall
correctly, were created to celebrate a special milestone for Oreos,
and so I gave them even more leeway and acceptance.
S’More
Oreos hit the shelves, and I admit I was intrigued by those.
Still…
again… it was those Cookie Dough Oreos.
Let’s
be honest… when you are an absolute top of the line signature
brand, there isn’t much wiggle room when it comes to change and
experimentation. (Anyone want to discuss New Coke? And there you
go.) And there shouldn’t be… because there is no need to be wiggling
or experimenting.
Oreos
are classic… Oreos are amazing… and there is ABSOLUTELY NO
NEED for Oreos to try to be a chocolate chip cookie.
And
that’s when I’d given up.
It
makes no sense. In a slightly different way of describing it…
chips should be served with a Rueben, not be the Rueben.
Personally,
I think we should all be ashamed of ourselves. And I’ll begin
writing a thorough chastising for us soon. (First though, I need
to track down and sample a bag of Lay’s West Coast Truffle Fries,
because those sound pretty good.)