Terry
and I have been kicking around adding a new streaming service
for a bit of time.
Honestly,
it really is a debate.
We’re
still connected to regular television viewing and, until recently,
hadn’t even begun to fully investigate the possibilities of putting
things together in a different way. We both have a handful of
shows we watch separately, and there are a number of programs
on the traditional networks that we enjoy. Plus, from time to
time we like checking in on the local news (especially when we
want updates on the snow that’s just started falling). In short…
…we
want our local network channels.
That’s
the foundation.
Want
to save dollars? Without question.
Have
a few things we would like to add from a new streaming service?
Yup.
But
the start is pretty basic. Even more simply put than not wanting
to lose the local stations, we know the channels we watch, know
the channels we don’t, and for the most part we can universally
and without hesitation say those channels we don’t watch will
never have a show we want to watch.
I
don’t think that’s too much different than most of you.
Let’s
point to ESPN.
I
haven’t watched ESPN in years. Years.
I
love sports. Love watching sports.
About
twenty years ago ESPN kicked their sponsored-play-of-the-day moments
into overdrive, where the sponsors got plenty of screen time and
the actual games got less. The announcers got louder while their
opinions were dumber.
I
clicked it off. Didn’t care about ESPN. I will admit that once
in a great while I might turn something on that ESPN is broadcasting,
but I’m not in any type of habit that sends me to any of their
stations. If you removed ESPN from my provider, it might be months
before I noticed.
So,
offer me a package that takes away ESPN but we still get Resident
Alien and save money each month, I’m in.
The
biggest twist (and likely most common) being that many of us don’t
need to watch live television. In fact, some may like binging
on episodes, avoiding commercials, and could be content with waiting
several months (or longer) until a show flops over to a streaming
platform. We know that eventually, we’ll be able to watch what
we want to watch.
Which
brings us to this… take our immediate and live-broadcast needs
(say local news and weather), and suddenly it is a game of just
finding out where the shows we want are available when we want
them.
While
the result is not quite the a la carte approach some of us may
have envisioned heading our way a few years ago, the reality isn’t
too far off. There’s Netflix, Amazon Prime, Hulu, Disney+… select
one from column a, two from column b… consider the services offering
those specialized programs you enjoy… laugh at Apple TV+ with
their five so-so shows while shaking your head and wondering who
the twenty-seven people are that actually subscribe to it… and
you have arrived at television for your home.
It
was a pretty decent live versus cable versus on demand versus
streaming war shaking out. Until…
What
the hell has been going on?
HBO
Max begins an all-out offensive to advertise twice per hour on
every station accepting commercials. CBS All-Access transitions
into Paramount+. Discovery+ not only provides original content,
but begins siphoning the next seasons of some shows away from
the cable offerings. Peacock is… well, no one knows what Peacock
is. But the general concept still holds water.
Ever
heard of being nickel-and-dimed to death? Ever watched the cost
of something like a new car or an airline ticket start out ok,
but then begin rising uncontrollably into the stratosphere as
you debate things like extended warranties and checking a second
bag? (Look, I get it. Boarding early and selecting a seat on a
plane, some things do make sense. But buying insurance in case
the keys for more car stop working? I’m pretty sure we were never
meant to have keys for our cars that possess more technology than
the equipment and programming necessary to get astronauts to the
moon and back.)
Strip
the theory back, and before you know it a pretty basic purchase
decision has spiraled massively out of control. And before you
accuse me of going crazy…
Sign
up for this network’s + offerings… sign up for that network’s
+ offerings… plus here for $4.99 and plus there for $5.99 and
plus $4 more if you don’t want ads. All of a sudden you’re spending
$30 a month on a collection of channels (where most you never
even knew existed), only you still can’t watch Tom Hanks in Greyhound
or get your local weather forecast.
That
$200 a month for cable you are trying to get rid of? Bring together
enough streaming services and it sure looks like you can quickly
get right back to $200 a month for the same lineup of content
you ignored before.
Eventually
we arrive at two questions.
Is
it worth it? Hell yes, it’s worth it. If you love Disney and Marvel
and Pixar, then Disney+ is a heaven-sent sugar high. Amazon delivers
some really great content plus free shipping. Dive into Netflix
and you’ll be stunned that you cannot stop finding movies and
shows you never knew existed but now can’t imagine having gone
without. A lot of it is worth it.
Is
it all worth it? No. Not even close. Yes, there are a few shows
and movies I’ve heard about that I’m disappointed I may never
see. But unless the free trial window is made a bit less complicated
(and a lot less input your credit card even though we’d never
bill you as long as you cancel on time, because the process is
easy and you’ll never have issues navigating the cancellation
procedures and you obviously won’t forget what day it is), I’m
probably not going to see them.
The
craziest part though, at least for me, is it feels like the networks
aren’t even pretending any more. When the commercials start, every
other ad involves a streaming platform. During the shows, in the
corner of the screen, announcements on ways I can find past seasons
or new shows and more. It’s like a never-ending subscription push.
And
I suppose it’s never going to end. Because as long as gargantuan
entertainment companies are willing to pour billions into obtaining
and creating content in the hopes of reaching profitability in
five to seven years, we’re going to be offered more. And those
providers trying to keep customers are going to do whatever they
can to develop ways or either keeping us subscribed or create
ways of signing us up for something different.
Hopefully
you like your television with chocolate sprinkles, because no
matter how you design and package your viewing options to get
rid of the things you don’t need, you’re probably going to find
you’re still paying extra for them (and still unable to see Greyhound).