The
other day, I had to switch from one form of a game on my phone
to another. For a simple explanation, the manufacturer/developer
had released a new version of the game, decided they were no long
going to support the really old and popular first edition of it,
and the time had come to delete one and transition to the other.
So,
Game out. Game 2, with the utmost begrudgingly
I can muster inserted as an adjective, installed.
This
happens to be one of those games you normally would play with
friends. Exchange some information so you can find each other,
and off you go. It also happens to be a game where pretty much
anyone that has an account and the good fortune to stumble across
you (or be randomly sent in your direction) can challenge you
to a game.
Nothing
wrong with that. In fact, over the years, you might say I’ve made
a handful of friends playing Game with friends. The new
game, however, has come with a few added elements I wasn’t expecting.
And for that, I’m mainly thinking about scammers.
Since
beginning to use the new game app, I have been flooded with requests
for games. A couple have been ok, with the extension of one game
into a more or less ongoing contest as the end of one match leads
to the start of another. But most of these new random matches?
Well…
One
person sent along a message after the opening plays and introduced
themselves as a woman living in the southeast Unites States. After
saying hello, then asking me where I lived and how long I had
been playing, she told me she was unemployed and wanted to know
if I’d like to see some nude photographs of her. Still seemed
friendly enough, I suppose, but that was quite the transition
from casual pleasantries.
Another
contest was unfolding with a man offering a greeting in the message
section. He kept doubling his questions up, repeating them, with
a sense of urgency if I didn’t respond after an hour or so. Like
this:
“Where do you live?”
My
usual way of playing is to go through a few matches, oldest to
newest, as I continue along with my day. Mostly, it’s a run of
five to fifteen minutes here and there, whenever opportunity comes
around. If I have work to do or chores to face, I am not concerned
about playing games. Priorities matter. I might even put my phone
down for a bit and not get back to it for a few hours. You understand,
it becomes a phone, not an idling gaming center. If it doesn’t
ring, I continue writing essays, assembling podcast episodes,
washing dishes, and anything else professionally and personally
that needs to be taken care of from my ongoing to do list of the
day.
“Where do you live”
What
I don’t do is unlock my phone every fifteen seconds, open the
gaming app again and again and again and again, and look to see
if I have any messages.
“I said, where do you live?”
I
never want to be rude. I’m a friendly guy. Love conversation and
enjoy the competition of a casual game with someone (even someone
I’m just meeting). Perhaps I’m totally misreading the message—as
so often texts and emails and more can be emphasized in unintended
ways and be misread—and it wasn’t his intention at all. But that
last one, came only about an hour at the first. Repeating the
same question three times in under sixty minutes. And the finish
certainly felt a bit firm and just a tad bit annoyed with my delayed
response. Again…
“I said, where do you live?”
Wow.
I
made a note in my mind that this person seemed a bit impatient.
A bit confrontational. But, willing to offer some room and patience,
I continued playing.
“I don’t even know if you’re a boy or a girl.”
That
was the next message. I ignored it and just made a play in the
game. Not long after, I picked up the phone to play a few games
while eating lunch.
“I said, I don’t even know if you’re a boy or a girl.”
I
chuckled a bit, thinking this was the time to block him. And as
I considered it, another message arrived.
“Are you a man or a woman?”
Blocked.
They
come from all directions and approaches. For every game that involves
someone apparently looking to engage in a contest of sorts, there
is another that within three moves is asking if I would like to
head over to this or that messaging app. And… what?
No,
seriously, what?
Sorry,
I don’t see the need to connect on WhatsApp or Telegram
or whatever. Is it really so distracting and noisy in the message
area of a game’s app that we need to wander away someplace a bit
quieter? How did playing Games with someone seemingly
turn into a crowded bar where we strangers can’t hear each other
text?
If
you go out bowling, meet someone on the lane next to yours, and
after several frames they ask if you want to grab some fries and
a drink in the alley’s restaurant later, I can connect the dots
and see how the journey played out to move from bowling to a booth
as you share some mozzarella sticks. Games feels like
a different environment. These progressions make no sense. I open
up the game to find a contest, receive a challenge and instead
of playing the game the person tells me I seem nice and should
download Snapchat. These dots do not connect.
Technology
really is changing the world. It seems we’ve become more aggressive
and less patient. It seems we’ve lost a sense of kindness in exchange
for a need to build defenses against anonymous scammers.
Perhaps
it’s me, and I’m the misguided one for not wanting to see a stranger
naked, not wanting to tell a person I’ve never met whether I’m
a man or a woman, or for not being open to moving a conversation
to someplace just a bit more private.
All
I wanted was to play a game.